Jonah Goldberg’s Take on “Defend to the Death” Rings a Bell…

Goldberg (from Wikipedia)

(Welcome, National Review readers!)

Jonah Goldberg is the writer I want to be if I grow up. (Since I’m a decade older than Goldberg, I guess I should have started earlier.)

Literally tens of people read this blog every day.  Goldberg, OTOH, has tens of bazillions of readers at National Review Online and elsewhere, and his first book, Liberal Fascism, was a No. 1 bestseller.  How did my first book do?  I’ll get back to you on that.  (Note to self: write a book.)

I bought Liberal Fascism despite the tendentious title, expecting humorous insights.  I found it more dry and scholarly than I expected.  (If you’d like to buy a copy based on that ringing endorsement, please do so through my Amazon widget in the column at right.)

Goldberg’s next book, due out in a few days, seems likely to be more fun, although the slightly less provocative title might keep a damper on sales. The book is Tyranny of Cliches: How Liberals Cheat in the War of Ideas, and if you’d like to purchase a copy, I recommend using my widget.  (Hey, did you know that if you go to Amazon via my widget, I’ll supposedly get a sliver of revenue from whatever you purchase in that browser session?)

Goldberg’s blog for the book offers a link to the introduction, where this passage caught my fancy:

There’s a kind of argument-that-isn’t-an-argument that vexes me. I first started to notice it on university campuses. I’ve spoken to a lot of college audiences. Often, I will encounter an earnest student, much more serious looking than the typical hippie with open-toed shoes and a closed mind. During the Q&A session after my speech he will say something like “Mr. Goldberg, I may disagree with what you have to say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”

Then he will sit down, and the audience will applaud. Faculty will nod proudly at this wiser-than-his-years hatchling under their wings. What a glorious moment for everybody. Blessed are the bridge builders.

My response? Who gives a rat’s ass?

First of all, my right to speak never was in doubt. Indeed, I’m usually paid to speak. Besides, I’ve given my speech already and we’re in Q&A time: Shouldn’t you have told me this beforehand? Second, the kid is almost surely lying. He’ll take a bullet for me? Really?

Clichés like these are a way to earn bravery on the cheap, defending principles you haven’t thought through or perhaps only vaguely support. Or, heck, maybe he really would leap on a grenade so I could finish talking about how stupid high-speed rail is. But it still doesn’t matter, because mouthing these sorts of clichés is a way to avoid arguments, not make them.

As I have in the past, I experienced a little frisson of kinship with Goldberg.  I’ve always been annoyed by the phony sincerity of the “defend to the death” line.  Here’s my take on it from three years ago:

There’s an old platitude, “I may not agree with what you say, but I would defend to the death your right to say it.”  That rings slightly false — although I would verbally defend your right to disagree with me, if there’s a realistic prospect of death, you’re probably on your own. But surely all of us would be better off if more people treated opposing ideas with some level of respect.

No, I don’t think Goldberg got the idea from me, I just think it’s kind of cool that by being a blogger, I can go back and look up stuff I wrote in the past, and brag about having an idea first.

Our Ridiculous System for Picking a Vice President

VP-Maker Myers

With the Republican nomination apparently sewn up, Mitt Romney now turns his attention to the most dangerous and dysfunctional ritual in all of American politics:  The choice of a running mate.  Today Romney named Beth Myers, a long-time senior advisor, to head his vice presidential search committee.

Romney will be the nominee because he is the last candidate standing after a grueling multi-year marathon of fundraising, organization-building and campaigning, leading up to a labyrinth of primaries and caucuses in which his qualifications were scrutinized in detail and weighed against those of other contenders.  He was essentially the runner-up for the nomination in 2008, which means he’s been running for president for more than half a decade.  If he wins, he may or may not become a good president, but at least he will have been thoroughly examined.

So how will the Republican VP nominee be selected?  Sometime in the next four months, Romney will make that decision unilaterally, after a secrecy-shrouded process of his own choosing.  Nobody else gets a vote.

Oh, the Republican Convention in late August could theoretically decline to nominate Romney’s pick, but that’s not going to happen.  Conventions are designed to be coronations, and if there’s no contest for the top of the ticket, there’ll be no contest for the bottom.

Forty-seven men have served as vice president of the United States, and 14 of them have gone on to become president — just under 30%. Disregard the five VPs who were elected in their own right, and you’ve got nine VPs who ascended because of the death or resignation of the president — about 19% of the total.

The primary duty of a vice president is to be ready — and qualified — to assume the presidency on a moment’s notice. Here are some of the people the two major parties have nominated, during my lifetime, for this somber and auspicious role:  Spiro Agnew, Sargeant Shriver, Geraldine Ferraro, Dan Quayle, John Edwards.  Four years ago, of course, John McCain tried to hit a five-run homer by choosing Sarah Palin, and succeeded only in creating a target-rich environment for Tina Fey.

I don’t have any bright ideas for a better system — I just know this one makes no sense.  And I hope I won’t end up reprising my 2008 election eve post: “Vote for McCain… and pray for his continued good health.”